Whoever said life is short didn't spend much time living.
I have three
Grandmas, from my mom, dad and paternal father's side, all who I love very
much. Two live outside of town, and one a 15 minute drive away.
My Grandma Pearl(y) is a woman who is hard to forget if you've had the chance to meet her. She's
tall, bold and religious. Three qualities I love in her.
I must also
mention: hard worker. I remember her drive and compelling attitude as
insurance broker. Outside of her career, she was friendly to every soul she
passed by. In the elevator, at the bank, at church or from inside her car.
"Heellllooo!" "How are you?" "Don't I know your
mummy?" Yes she could talk! And those suits and heels, never one to leave
her house undone.
Every Sunday, my
Grandma was always present at church and encouraged us to learn about God. My
sisters and I were brought to church concerts and summer camps and were always
introduced as her "grand-babies." When my parents needed a babysitter
Grandma was always prepared. With about 20 heavy duty blankets she would make
up as a makeshift bed for us to sleep on. Then in the morning we could expect
fresh fried dumpling with mackerel or ackee and salt-fish, alongside mint tea
(with an ice cube so it wouldn't be too hot).
Grandma Peal was
rough but lovable; she loved to show us off, feed us and tell stories of
how she watched us as babies. When we were old enough, she sent us on errands
to buy groceries or a snack. And as soon as we walked out of the building you
would hear her calling out "bye" from nearly twenty stories up. As
years went by Grandma changed careers and started a cleaning company. We came
along as her helpers and got paid for our assistance. It was hard work but she
stuck to it. Then one day my Grandma was involved in a car accident and had a
bad hit to the head. Afterwards she left her job and retired from working.
I noticed that
after the accident she rarely left her house and spent a lot of time alone,
despite living with her husband. So I decided to start sleeping over on the
weekends. These were great times, as I knew she really enjoyed my company. I
also enjoyed the being away from distractions like the internet and just
listening to her talk about her life and how 'maga' I was. While at her house I
notice she was developing strange habits like being paranoid and not being able
to recognize the reflection in the mirror. Because she was so active and alert,
I thought this behaviour would simply die down after a while.
It's
been about a year and a half since my Grandma has been losing her memory and
strength. Each week she seems to get worse, and it's heartbreaking to see a
woman who was once indestructible show signs of major weight loss, fear,
and difficulty having conversations. For over a year my Grandma now visits our
home each week. It is reassuring to see her even though it's hard to accept the
changes. She was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and a hard time with short and long
term memory.
You
never know what your life will reveal as you go on your journey but family is
one of the most important connections that you have. Being with my Grandma and
seeing how my mom has gone above and beyond to care for her mother-in-law shows me
the true meaning of love. It's unconditional. In her weakest moments, we are
there for her and that's what I know keeps her spirit moving.
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